A Tale of Randomness
by Tails The Ultimate Lifeform
Summary: Randomness incarnate... That's really all I can say... This is my first fan fic. Fiction rating changed to T. Blame the guys. Discontinued.
1. Chapter 1

Before you read this, I just want to say some things. This is my first fan fic, and I started writing it last year. I originally considered one page of tablet paper (yes, I wrote this on paper) a chapter. The cameos may not make a lot of sense, unless you're into a lot of popular games and TV shows and stuff. Also, there's no actual plot in this story. Finally, I have several chapters typed up already, but they're in present tense, so I have to put them in past tense. I should have them up fairly quickly. Anyway, on to the story!

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**A Tale of Randomness**

**Chapter 1**

**"It" begins…**

One disturbingly peaceful, infernally sunny, Dr. Eggman not trying to take over the Earth only to be foiled by every ones favorite spiny hero, day. Sonic The Hedgehog and Miles 'Tails' Prower were sitting in chairs, at the table, in the dining room, in Tails' house, in the Mystic Ruins, on the planet Earth, in the Milky way galaxy, eating breakfast.

"Sonic, why is the author describing what we're doing in such excruciating detail?" Tails asked, while his bacon watched in horror as the eggs were being consumed by the orange, two-tailed fox.

"I don't know little buddy." replied the blue hedgehog, "Maybe he just went so far off the deep end that he-"

But before Sonic could finish, an abnormally large owl, which all skilled Zelda players loathe, appeared from out of nowhere. He landed on a tree with no leaves and one branch that appeared for no reason! "Blaspheme!" said Keapora Geabora, "Infidels, heretics, naysayers, purists ", he rambled on, incoherently like this for about an hour, "-and that is why you must never mix toilet water with Republicans!" he finished.

Then Mirror B. music began to play. A conga line formed, and the annoying all knowing boring owl of infinite headaches, known as Keapora Geabora, shook his feathered bootie out the door marked, "The Wonderfully Boring World of Annoying All Knowing Boring Owls of Infinite Headaches."

"What in the name of Dabura Cookie was that all about!" Sonic yelled.

"Blame your fate!" commanded a mysterious voice.

Then, a strange winged man, who wore a green bathrobe and shower cap, descended the dining room stairs.

"Who are you!" Tails asked, "…You're not the Ice-Cream-Man! (A/N: No, not that kind…)"

Then, the stranger turned to look at Tails, "I…am Remiel, I am an angle of judgment." he replied condescendingly, "I am also a world renowned bed wetter, and I sleep with a moose…an angelic moose." Suddenly, the chapter ended.

For what unholy purpose has this creepazoid appeared? And…does he really sleep with…A MOOSE? Be sure to watch the next exciting episode of **DRAGON BALL Z!**

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Short chapter. I know. It's more like one-fifth of a chapter. But the next chapter is longer.


	2. Chapter 2

Okay, chapter 2 starts right when chapter 1 ends. I could have combined them, but then I couldn't use a certain joke.

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**Chapter 2**

**It's Time To D-D-D-D-D-DUEL!**

Last time on **DRAGON BALL Z!** Stuff happened!

"Inferior beings. I have no further need of you. BEGONE!" commanded Remiel, as he invoked the ancient art of 'Pokemon Battle'.

"Mew! I choose you!" Sonic said as he threw a small ball that was red on top and white on the bottom.

The ball opened and out popped a cute little floating pink creature. "Mew!" it said.

"Sonic sent out Mew!" said an omnipresent voice.

"Mew! Thunder Wave!" commanded Sonic.

Mew sent a wave of lightning at Remiel.

"Remiel has been paralyzed!" said the voice.

"Hidden Power!" Remiel yelled, as he summoned a ring of little balls around himself.

"Wow! It used Hidden Power!" said the voice.

Then the balls flew right at Mew.

"Oh! It's been POISONED!" said the voice.

"What!" Sonic yelled in confusion, as he rushed over to Mew. "Mew! Mew! Speak to me, Mew!" he said as he held his Pokemon.

"………" Mew said nothing, for it was not poisoned at all. It was actually frozen solid, but the voice forgot his spectacles, and could not see clearly.

"Remieeeeelllll! You will PAY for this!" Sonic yelled to the heavens. "Take this you winged Moblin, Master Ball GOOOOOOOO!" he yelled, as he threw the purple and white ball of guaranteed-catch-anything-ness at the reincarnated dead guy.

Remiel was sucked into the ball.

"3… 2… 1... You caught a Remiel!" said the voice. (A/N: Remiel is a nonexistent, ancient, extinct, Legendary Pokemon that exists in a nonexistent realm of nonexistent nothingness.)

"Alright! I caught a Remiel!" Sonic said with glee, apparently forgetting his Mew.

"Would you like to give it nickname?" asked the voice.

"Yes, I would." Sonic replied. Then, a giant keyboard thing fell from the sky. It landed 2 inches away from Sonic's nose.

"Now, please enter a name for your new Pokemon." said the voice. Sonic entered a name. "Flaky has been sent to Bill's PC." said the voice.

Just then, "STOOOOOP!" someone shouted.

"Who are you?" Sonic asked.

"I be thee Great Mizuti." responded the floating, masked weirdo.

"What do you want?" Sonic asked.

"I challenge you to a Pokemon Battle!" said Mizuti.

"Very well then. It's time to D-D-D-D-D-DUEL!" Sonic yelled.

Then, for unknown reasons, a man jumped out of the garbage can. "Then it's agreed. This battle shall determine nothing. Medabots ROOOOOOO BATTLLLLLLLLE!" shouted the man.

Then, Mizuti sent out a strange little bird thing. "Thee Great Mizuti chooses, Glazed Birdie! Go, Glazed Birdie!" Mizuti said.

Then Sonic drew a card.

"Uh-oh." Mizuti said.

"You don't stand a chance against me." Sonic said in a very Kaiba-like voice. Then he raised the card into the air, "I summon The Blue-Eyes White Dragon! (Attack 3000, Defense 2500)"

"What thee!" Mizuti said in shock, as a giant dragon emerged from the card in Sonic's hand.

"Ha ha ha ha!" Sonic laughed. "Soon your pathetic excuse for a Duel Monster will be gone!" Then, he played two more cards. "You may want to start praying, for there is no way that you can defeat THREE dragons!"

"AHHHHH!" Mizuti screamed in terror.

"But, I'm not done." Sonic said. Then, he played another card. "I play Polymerization, to fuse my dragons!" The dragons did a three-way Fusion Dance… "Behold! The Blue Eyes Ultimate Dragon! (Attack 4500, Defense 3000)" he yelled, as the three dragons merged into one three-headed dragon.

"NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Mizuti yelled.

"It's not over yet!" Sonic said. "I activate one Black Pendent, and three Axe of Despair Magic Cards! (1000+1000+1000+5003500 power boost. 3500+4500Attack 8000)"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! It be thee second coming of Malpercio! RUUUUUN!" Mizuti screamed. (A/N: Malpercio is a dead, evil god of destruction, mayhem, and pain.)

"ATTAAAACK! NEUTRON BLAAAAST!" Sonic commanded. The three heads of the dragon all barfed on the bird with the force of one-hundred nuclear bombs and a carrot.

"I win! I win! Now, give me the chao!" Sonic demanded.

"Fine, humph! Dirty, rotten, cheater!" retorted Thee Great Mizuti.

"Chao, chao, chao!" the chao thanked Sonic. Sonic looked at the chao, the chao looked at Sonic, they move closer, closer, **_CLOSER!_** Then………………………… GOOD GOD! SONIC ATE THE CHAO! Then he threw up. Dr. Eggman is lying in the puddle of yuck.

"Eggman!" Sonic yelled, "What in the name of Tails are you doing here?"

The egg replies as follows. "I am here because… Because… Hmmm, why AM I here?" 10 minutes later… "Ah, yes! No, wait… No… No… Ah-ha! Yes! That's it! **_I REMEMBER!_**" he proclaimed, almost as though a miracle had occurred, "I came here to do…THIS!" Eggman starts to dance like a ballerina. (A/N: pukes) Then Sonic summoned a flock of bloodthirsty hummingbirds. They drank there fill of 'eggnog' and flew away.

"Is that all?" Sonic asked.

"No it's not! I also came to do this!" Eggman announced, he then pressed the A button, on his GCN controller.

"AHHHHH!" Sonic screamed as he grew a second head.

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Tails: AHHHHHHHH! NOOOOOOOOO!

Me: What?

Tails: Why wasn't I in this chapter!

Me: …Uh…Tails, you just were.

Tails: Where? When?

Me: Right here. Right now.

Tails: Ohhhhhh…Okay!


	3. Chapter 3

_(sigh)_ Another puny chapter. Oh well... Please note, I have nothing against religion.

Disclaimer: (I forgot about these) I do not own any Sonic characters. They are owned by Sega. Other characters belong to whoever they belong to. Divine entities are owned by no one. They own us...

This chapter starts where the last one ended.

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**Chapter 3**

**AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!**

"AHHHHH! This is bad! This is very, very bad!" both heads yelled in unison.

Then, all of a sudden, a small ring box with a 'B' button on it fell from the heavens with the speed of a bullet-train on steroids, and oddly, landed right in front of Sonic. No explosion...

"Press me, Sonic!" commanded the ring box. Sonic did just that. A man popped out of the ring box, he had a yellow afro, sunglasses, a blue shirt, black pants, brown shoes, big muscles, and 5ft long nose hairs. "Wherever there's a head of hair being threatened by a criminal clipper I'll be there! I am Bo Bo Bo... Bo BOOOOOO Bo Bo!" he announced.

"What are you doing here you big buffoon!" came the voice of God.

"Sorry ,O-Holy one, but when nature calls I answer." Bo Bo Bo said, attempting to beat the sun in a staring contest.

"**AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!** How in the name of ME, did you do your business…IN MY PANTS...**THAT I'M WEARING..._RIGHT NOW_**!" God yelled so loudly that he caused himself to go deaf.

"No idea, Mr. High-And-Mighty." said Bo-Bo-Bo. He held a huge trophy.

"AHHHH! HELP MEEEE!" Sonic screamed.

"What?" asked the deaf god.

"I said, help me!" Sonic said.

"WHAT!" yelled the deaf creator of everything and Eggman's mustache.

"**HHHHHHHHHHHHHHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLLPPPPPPPPPPPPPP MMMMMMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEEEEE!** " Sonic yelled so loudly that the sound waves of his voice caused the Moon itself to became Pluto's new roommate (get it?).

"Oh fine!" God said.Then, the holy light of Heaven began to break through the clouds.

"AHHHHH!" Sonic screamed as he returned to normal.

"AHHHHH!" Bo Bo Bo screamed as he turned into a cheeseburger.

God then reached down and consumed the Bo-Bo-Burger. "(_crunch), (munch), (chew), (grind), (swallow),_ Mmmm, yum."

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Tails: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Not again! Do you hate foxes or something!

Me: Huh? Did you say something?

Tails: WHAT! That's it! (_chokes me)_

Me: (_being choked)_ Don't worry, Tails. You'll be in the next one.

God: Umm... (_looks at script)_ Please review? Hey, what's a review?

Me & Tails: We dunno.


	4. Chapter 4

Okay, I've redone this chapter. It now has plenty to do with the Sonic Universe, but it's the same chapter otherwise. This chapter takes place during chapters 2 & 3, and it kinda explains why Tails wasn't in those chapters.

Disclaimers: I do not own Sonic, Tales of Symphonia, or Dragon Ball Z.

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**Chapter 4**

**The Goof Ball, The Wish, And The Toilet**

Meanwhile, far, far, far, far away, somewhere over the rainbow, on the planet Earth, in the White House, in a closely guarded, highly classified, top-secret bathroom, Mr. President was worshiping a toilet…

"Okay, time to test out this new-fangled contraption that Commander gave me." he proclaimed, "O Great Golden Toilet of all knowing plumbing, I desire an egg salad, with tuna fish. Oh, and I would also like a flame-broiled two-tailed fox. I hear they are quite tasty. O Mystic Toilet, will you grant my wish?"

Then, a brown object pooped up in the yellow liquid in the toilet.

"Hmm... What the heck is that thing?" Mr. P asked no one in particular. Then, he picked it out.

"O stupid idiot." the toilet gurgled, "Thou hast plucked my yucky stuff. Thy wish shall be granted."

"What did you say! Did you just call my mother fat!" Mr. P retorted, in ignorance.

"Shut thy yap, mortal!" replied the golden gateway to Fish Heaven.

Lights flashed, and smoke puffed. Then, defying the laws physics, nature, and reality, the recently regurgitated Dr. Eggman made his grand resurgence…sleeping in a bowl of lettuce... Followed by a Magikarp on a plate. And finally, a two-tailed fox, who was happy to be back in the story, but not happy at all to be tied to a grill.

"Yummy!" said Mr. P. The Prez looked around for the golden toilet, who was hiding in an outhouse.

Just then, "**RRRROOOOAAAARRRR! **Oww not the face!" yelled a swordsman named Zelos, as he jumped through the open window, closed it, broke the glass, replaced the window, and slapped himself in the face. "**DIE, **you good for nothin' thingamahicky!" he said as he sliced the Big Cheese in half with Excalibur.

"Thank you, my good man." Mr. P said, "That large dairy product was a real pain in Commander's butt."

-FLASH BACK-

Mr. P and Commander were in a room with a catapult.

"I don't know about this, Sir!" Commander said.

"Nonsense! I'm the President, so **I **give the orders!" Mr. P stated. "Now bend over, Commander!"

The reluctant Commander did so.

Mr. P pressed the 'X' button on his PS2 controller. This caused the catapult to launch a giant cheese-wheel at Commander.

Commander let out a scream of pain when the cheese hit his buttocks.

-END FLASH BACK-

"Here's $9,999 dollers and 99 cents." Mr. P said, as he paid Zelos. "Go buy yourself a pinwheel."

"No way, man!" Zelos shouted, "I'm gonna get me some chicks! And I don't mean the feathered kind!" Then he jumped through the window, broke it, and replaced it again.

Mr. P proceeded to stuff his face with the Excaliburized cheese. Then he moved on to the Eggman salad, but threw up. (A/N: He's allergic.) He then attempted to eat the Magikarp, but failed, because it evolved into Gyarados and used Petal Dance. Then it made a hole in the wall and walked out the door.

"I AM going to eat YOU!" stated the psychotic president, as he moved toward Tails.

Just then, (_Cue DBZ music_) "KA-ME-HA-ME-HAAAAAA!" yelled Goku.

Mr. P was blown backwards by a large river of energy.

Goku rescued the frying fox.

"Goku! What are YOU doing here!" Tails asked.

"I'm saving your life, and preventing Mr. P from eating the author's favorite character." replied the Saiyan. Then he put his fingers on his head and yelled "Instant Transmission!" Then they disappeared in a flash of light.

Ten hours later, "NOOOOOOOO! My dinner!" Mr. P yelled, finally realizing that his wish was gone.

"Mr. Preeeesideeeent!" sang a G.U.N. soldier who was wearing a tutu and dancing like a ballerina, "You must saaaay the magic worrrrrd!"

"No! Shut-up you freak!" I yelled.

"What will happen then?" Mr. P asked.

"Youuuuurrrrrr ceeeereeeebraaaal corteeeeex will explooooode!" sang the G.U.N. soldier.

"Hmm. I have no idea what that is… Well if one of my pawns says I must… then it must be important. What's the word?" Mr. P asked.

"No! That's your brain, you dummy!" I yelled, in an attempt to stop the inevitable destruction.

"Hey! Who is that anyway?" Mr. P asked.

"I dunnoooooooooo!" replied the singing idiot.

"Now tell me the word already!" shouted Mr. P.

"The magic wooooord is cheeeeeese!" replied the dancing G.U.N. soldier.

"Cheeeeeese!" Mr. P said.

"NOOOOOOOOOOO! You IDIOT!" I yelled.

**KABOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!**

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Me: …Oh fiddlesticks… My story is ruined... NOT!

Tails: So... does this mean I'll be in the next one?

Me: Yup.

Tails: Yippee! Yahoo! Take that, Saturn!

Me: ... Uhhhhh… Please review.


	5. Chapter 5

Okay, this is where the actual story begins. That other stuff was just completely random ideas that came together to create a scenario. From this point on, there is an actual plot. But it's still very random.

Disclaimers: I do not own Sonic the Hedgehog or any other characters.

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**Chapter 5**

**The Kazoo**

Sonic and Tails were, under water, on the sea floor, on the planet Earth, in the Milky Way galaxy. They were not wearing any kind of scuba gear what so ever, yet they did not drown.

"NOOOOO! Not again!" Tails yelled.

"Hey! Mr. Omnipresent!" Sonic shouted.

"What?" I replied in a god-like way.

"You over describe stuff." Sonic stated.

"Yeah? Well when nature calls, I answer." I answered.

"What does that-? Oh-no!" Sonic said, realizing something bad would happen. "AHHHHH!" He screamed, as a pile of toxic waste product fell on him. "You…You sicko!" he cried.

Then, the twice regurgitated Dr. Eggman appeared in a cloud of squid ink, wearing a Santa suit.

"HO HE HO!" he tried to laugh like Santa but failed miserably. "I am here. Now let's spread Holiday cheer."

A piece of driftwood conked him on the head.

"Bwack, buck buck buck! BAGACK!" He began acting like a chicken, before soiling his pants and snapping back to reality. He felt something strange 'down there'. He put his hands to his cheeks and screamed like a little girl, upon realizing his wet spot.

"Eggman! What are you doing here, wearing Santa's clothing!" Tails asked.

"I have absolutely NO idea what so EVER!" Eggman said proudly.

And then the real Santa appeared in a cloud of reindeers, wearing his pajamas. "HO HO HO!" he laughed authentically.

"**SANTA!**" Tails yelled happily, like a kid that just met Santa.

"Ah, Miles, have you been being a good boy this year?" said jolly old St. Nick.

"Uh-huh! Uh-huh! I've been a real good boy this year!" Tails said proudly.

"Hmm. It looks like you've even saved the world a few times." Santa said, "Normally I don't do this, but I will give you a present early this year."

"YEAHOOOOOO!" Tails yelled, like a kid who was getting a Christmas present early.

"Ooooh, what about me?" Eggman asked.

"What about you?" Santa asked.

"I want a present too." Eggman said, forgetting that he stolen Santa's suit, and was wearing it, and had taken a leak in it.

"Oh yes, I have a _special _gift for _you_." Santa said deviously. "Close your eyes."

Eggman did just that.

Santa reached into his sack and took out a lump of coal the size of the Moon, and just drops the thing on Eggman!

"AHHHHHHHHHHH!" screamed Eggman, as he was being crushed under the weight of the giganormos rock.

"Eggman you are a VERY naughty boy, EVERY year. So you got what you deserved." Santa stated, he then reclaimed his garments and then evaporated.

"What's- what's happening- to- to my body? My- my body is disintegrating! Pro- Pronyma! You tricked me!" Eggman yelled incoherently, "But I WON'T die alone! I'm taking this waste product with me!" Then he took the waste product and stuffed it down his pants. He then began to swim away like a dead stick of deodorant, thinking it was 'trendy'.

"NOOOO! My kazoo!" he yelled after dropping it, when a jellyfish tried to French kiss him. "Come back! Come back to me, my wittle kazoo." he yelled like a baby.

"That was weird..." Sonic said, "So anyway, Tails, what did Santa give you?"

Tails stared in wonderment at the object in his hands. "…A copy of Sonic Ultra Collection: Special Championship Edition, which was just a joke used in Nintendo Power Magazine!" Tails exclaimed.

"Wait, how can that be? That game hasn't even become a conscious thought yet!" Sonic said, almost as though he expected to be informed by Yuji Naka.

"My KAZOOOOOOOOOOO-00000000000000-gadfdfvjnjksdnundns-ooooooooooooo!" Eggman yelled, as he faded out of sight, still chasing his kazoo.

Then, an idea popped into Tails' head. "Sonic, Eggman must have sold his left armpit to a zebra in order to acquire knowledge on how to con a leopard into giving him a device that allows him to enslave turnips that create a doohickey that enables him to create an exact replica of Shadow's kazoo!" Tails said in a way that made him sound intelligent.

"Well then, there's only one thing to do little buddy." Sonic said, "We go and beat the snot outta Shadow until he spills his beans, literally and figuratively."

And so they went to where Shadow lives, when he's trying to remember what he had for breakfast 50 years ago. In other words Space Colony ARK! In orbit around Earth, in space, in the Milky Way galaxy.

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Tails: The next chapter has pies!

Me: The next chapter also has Shadow!

Tails: And don't forget the battle!

Me: Oh, that's right! The battle!

Me & Tails: Please review!


	6. Chapter 6

Okay, this chapter is longer than any previous one. Enjoy!

Disclaimers: I do not own Sonic, Mario, Pokemon, Tales of Symphonia, or any related characters.

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**CHAPTER 6**

**THE CHAOS PIES**

Sonic and Tails found their way to Shadow's shadowy lair of shadowy shadows, a.k.a. Space Colony Ark.

"Hey Shaaaaadooooow!" Sonic shouted.

"Shadow, where are you!" Tails shouted. "Shaaaad-" They stopped when they heard the classic Mario music. To their horrifically horrifying horrified horror, they found Shadow dancing to the beat of Dance Dance Revolution: Mario Mix (To Sonic, Mario is the Devil.)

"Hello, Faker." Shadow said.

"Shadow! NOOOO0000oooo!" Sonic shouted, as he grabbed Tails and lunged right at Shadow, in slow motion. Shadow stepped out of the way, unaffected by the slow motion. Sonic, still in slow motion crashed into a statue of Maria that was holding a living Pichu.

"MARIA!" Shadow shouted, "How dare you, Faker and Fox! You will pay for that you… you… SONS OF EGGMAN! Chaos Control!" He then moved the entire colony to the left 5ft, thus causing the others to be off the statue.

"Thanks Shadow, I- AHHHHH!" Sonic screamed, as Shadow Chaos Controlled a pie the size of an elephant right at Sonic. But it missed and hit Tails, who then proceeded cleaned himself off like a normal fox. "Whew! That was close. What the**-**" Sonic yelled, as Shadow, with sniper rifle aim, threw a 'Chaos Pie' the size of Texas at poor Sonic. "That's it!" Sonic exclaimed. And then a turn-based battle began.

"SONIC AND TAILS VS. SHADOW AND MARIA STATUE!" announced the Super Smash Bros. announcer.

"Chaos Pie!" Shadow yelled, as he threw a pie into a nearby air-vent.

"…" being a statue, Maria Statue said nothing, but lights flashed, and a shield materialized around a pocket of air.

"Thunder Blade!" Tails yelled, causing a sword of lightning to hit the ground in the middle of an elevator.

"Take this" Sonic said, as he began his default Spin-Dash. Shadow started eating a Chaos Pie.

"What! You can eat those!" Sonic asked in confusion "Hey! Give me one!"

"Fine. You can have this one, Faker." Shadow said deviously, as he threw an evil-looking pie to Sonic.

Sonic took one bite. "Yuck! Oh yuck! What kind of pie is this?" he said, puking.

"It's… MEAT pie! Mwa-ha-ha-ha!" Shadow replied with wickedly wicked wickednessness.

"AHHHH! NOOOO! WHYYYY!" Sonic screamed, "I mean… you gave Tails a PIZZA!" he looked at Tails, who was in pizza bliss, eating a pizza with his mouth that was on his face.

"Ever hear of a 'Pizza-pie',Faker?" Shadow replied coldly.

"Can anyone tell me why we're eating pie?" Tails asked.

"Because!" the hedgehogs said in unison.

"Because why?" Tails retorted.

"Because we're hungry." replied the hedgehogs in unison.

"But, shouldn't we be beating up Shadow?" Tails asked stupidly.

"Oh yeah! Shadow! Give us the waffle, NOW!" Sonic demanded, without contemplating the delicate intricacies of his verbal statement.

"NEVER!" Shadow yelled, "Peaches, RUUUUUN!" He and the Pichu ran in circles around the room. Tails tried to grab the Pichu, but he got Thunder Shocked. Sonic tried to grab Shadow, but got pepper-sprayed.

Suddenly, "MWA-HA-HA-HA!" Eggman laughed, as he flew in with his hovercraft. Next to him were: Metal Sonic in a cage, and what looked like the toxic waste product that Eggman collected in the previous chapter, but it appeared to have an EGG-sticker on it. "Behold! This is my newest creation, The EGG-Lump!"

He let Metal out of his cage, and another turn-based battle began.

SONIC, TAILS, SHADOW, MARIA STATUE & PEACHES VS. DR. EGGMAN, METAL SONIC & THE EGG-LUMP!

Sonic attempted to poke the EGG-Lump, but it… umm… lumped? Tails cast Thunder Arrow at Eggman. Shadow and Peaches double teamed Metal with Chaos Pies and Thunder Wave. And the statue made a shield. Eggman pressed a button labeled 'press me, you idiot'. Two arms came out of Eggman's hovercraft, holding salt and pepper shakers. They poured the condiments all over him.

"Eggman! You taste like eggs and bacon!" Tails said excitedly, licking his lips, after… licking him…

"What! No! Stay away! AHHHHH!" Eggman screamed, as he was consumed by the young fox.

"ERROR! ERROR! MALFUNCTION! MALFUNC**-**" Metal reported before he was destroyed by Shadow and Peaches.

The EGG-Lump continued to…lump...

"Is that all you can do, Lumpy?" Sonic asked the lumpy lump that was the EGG-Lump.

"Just ignore it, Sonic." Tails suggested.

And so they all turned away, and then… **BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! **The EGG-Lump self-destructed for no reason…

"AHHHH!" Tails screamed as Eggman created indigestion within the fox!

"Let me… **OOOOUUUUTTTT!**" Eggman yelled, and then Tails puked him up! "At last! I'm free! I'm free!" Eggman shouted, as he ran around the room like a chicken. Then, Eggman, for no reason, announced, "I stole the kazoo from some loser outside Kazoos R Us!"

Suddenly, the room began to shake, however, the rest of the colony, defying the laws of physics, did not.

Then the Summon Spirit of Darkness (also named Shadow) appeared before the confused bunch.

"THEIF!" he said in a deep, raspy voice, "EGGMAN… THEIF… STOLE KAZOO!"

Then Sonic stepped forward. "I am Sonic! I seek a pact with Shadow!" he blurted out, without thinking.

Then, to everyone's dismay, "SHEENA AND I…PACT!" the Summon Spirit rasped.

Then a black haired, female ninja named Sheena appeared in a puff of smoke. "Give Shadow back his kazoo!" she demanded.

Then something sparked in Eggman, "Oh! My heart is aflutter with your image. Would you consider bearing my children?" Eggman asked without realizing the grave mistake he had made.

"AHHHH! Get away from me, you sick pervert!" Sheena said before whacking him out the airlock.

"AHHHH! Noooo! It can't beeee! Now I'll never get to eat cheeeese!" Eggman screamed as he plummeted to Earth.

"I am Shadow! I seek a pact with myself!" Shadow said, completely ignorant of what he was saying.

"I AM…CONFUSED..." the Summon Spirit replied in confusion…

Then Mario jumped out of a pipe.

"I am Tails! I seek a pact with Mario!" Tails said.

"Princess-a Peach-a and-a I-a, pact-a." the plumber responded, trying to sound like the Summon Spirit. Then Sonic threw him out into space.

"Mama Miaaaaaaa!" cried the earthbound plumber.

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Me: Okay, the next chapter has a 'flower'.

Tails: (_drooling on a picture of Cosmo_)

Me: Oh! It also has drool. LOTS of drool.

Tails: (_still drooling_)

Me: ...

Drool: Please review.


	7. Chapter 7

Hello, everyone! Today's forecast calls for a severe chance of drool. If you're planning on going swimming, please wear one-piece suits.

Disclaimers: I do not own Sonic The Hedgehog or any other characters. They are owned by people who can't tell the difference between a good game system, and a piece of trash. I also do not own Cosmo's wardrobe... I do, however, own a Nintendo Wi-Fi USB Connector.

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**Chapter 7**

**Lakeside Chaos**

A few days after the events on the Space Colony ARK, Sonic and Shadow were sitting on the sidewalk watching paint dry.

A few hours later, Tails found them. They were still watching the paint, even though it had dried long ago. "Hi guys." Tails said.

Shadow instinctively threw a Chaos Pie at Sonic for no reason. Sonic retaliated by baking a cake.

"Um, guys?" asked the confused fox. Shadow threw a Chaos Pie at Tails. Tails then used paint remover to remove the paint. Upon seeing the utter lack of paint in front of him, Sonic feinted, and Shadow, in a fit of randomness, threw a Chaos Pie at himself.

An hour later, Cosmo came walking up to them. "Hello." she said.

"Hello." the others replied in unison.

"What are you guys doing?" Cosmo asked.

"We're performing a 3-way Fusion Dance." they responded in unison.

"O...kay..." said the disturbed flower girl, "Well anyway. I was planning on going for a swim, in A Lake Somewhere Near Here, and I was wondering if you would like to come with me?"

An hour, and three coin flips later, "Okay." they replied, once again, in unison.

At 'A Lake Somewhere Near Here', A.L.S.N.H. for short. Everyone was ready. Cosmo was in a two-piece bikini (A/N: _drool_). Tails and Shadow were wearing flippers and goggles, otherwise, they were naked as usual. Sonic, being an aqua phobic, was wearing a scuba suit, inside of a submarine that was wearing a scuba suit.

"ASPARAGUS!" Shadow announced for reasons that were beyond the comprehension of mortal beings.

Tails mounted Shadow on the front of a ghost ship and set sail. "Ha ha ha! The sun, the sea, this is the life! When we cross the Grand Line, I'll be King of The Pirates!" Tails proclaimed.

Then Shadow hit him with a Chaos Pie, "No you won't!" Shadow shouted, "Unless I get to be QUEEN of the pirates!"

Tails, refusing to be married to Shadow, began to dismantle the ship while it was still on the water.

"You boys are so immature." stated Cosmo, who was sitting on a chair in a huge sandcastle on the beach.

"Hey Faker!" Shadow yelled, lobbing a lobster on Sonic.

Sonic tossed the lobster back into the lake. "Whatcha want, ya whippersnapper?" he replied like a cranky old geezer.

"You wanna come out here with us?" Shadow asked.

"No way! I hate lemons!" Sonic replied, while sucking on a lemon.

"What!" Tails butted in, confused.

"I said you're a tuna fish!" Sonic answered.

"Yeah? Well you're an Erinaceidae" (A/N: Erinaceidae is the Latin name for hedgehog). Tails yelled.

"I don't know what that is!" Sonic confessed.

"STOP IT! ALL OF YOU!" Cosmo interrupted, "You're all a bunch of ragamuffins!" She then threw a Bob-omb into the air.

Five seconds later, _**BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!** _Then, 'Frosty the Snowman' started playing and Tetris blocks began falling from plot holes.

Everyone started panicking as the falling polygons of geometricnessness fell with much fallness.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Sonic screamed. Then, he curled into the fetal position and started sucking his thumb.

Shadow attempted to throw Chaos Pies into the sky, hoping they would fly, but they fell back down into his face. Tails did the smart thing. He rearranged the blocks so that they would disappear. Cosmo was in her castle of sand, hula dancing. (A/N: _droooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooool_)

Just then, it started raining a very thick rain. "Siiiiinging in the raaaaaaaain. Siiiiinging in the raaaaaaa-cough-cough-cough." Sonic sang, allowing the liquid to enter his musical mouth.

"What's wrong, Faker?" Shadow asked, while trying to bake himself into a Chaos Pie.

"This rain is... SALIVA!" Sonic replied in shock.

"It all started when Cosmo... wait a sec... COSMO!" yelled the contemplationing fox.

"What is it?" replied Cosmo, who was getting worried.

"GET HER!" the boys yelled as they attacked the poor flower girl, accidentally ripping her bikini off, revealing the fact that plants don't have 'em. (A/N:_drooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooool_)

A tidal wave of drool, the size of Texas, washed over them.

659,347,238,302,575,748,478,373,937,577,853,873,277,585,769,086,015,467,383,166,587,234,093,645,773,293,456,676,549 gigazillian to the 100th power years later., the universe had just achieved galactic peace. 10 seconds later, it experienced the end of time.

"That was a confusing story, Dad..." said a nameless human child, to his nameless human father.

"What story?" asked a naked Cosmo. (A/N:_drooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooool_)

"AAAAHHHH!" the two nameless humans screamed as a tidal wave covered their planet in spit.

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Me: Okay, this is not the end of the story!

Tails: That's right! The next chapter has good ol' Knux.

Me: That's right! Knuckles goes through a Special Stage.

Tikal: I'm in it, too!

Cosmo: (_still unclothed_) Please review.


	8. Chapter 8

This chapter is longer than any before it. And yes, the drool at the end of chapter 6 did, in fact, talk.

Disclaimers: I do not own Sonic The Hedgehog. He is owned by Sega. I do not own Pac-Man. He is owned by those bastards at Namco, who keep giving Sony all of the Tales series games, even though Nintendo deserves them more. I also do not own Yuji Naka. He is owned by Satin, who is a Sony fan.

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**Chapter 8**

**A Tormented Echidna & A Sleep Deprived Pac-Man**

The day after the 'incident' at ALSNH, Sonic and the others decided to go to Angel Island. Eventually, after taking a detour through Mushroom Hill they arrive at (According to the map in SADX) the Alter of Emerald.

"Hey Sonic! Look at that!" Tails shouted.

"Look at what?" Sonic asked.

"**THAT!**" Tails yelled, pointing to a certain red echidna, who was starring blankly at the Master Emerald.

"Knuckles!" Sonic shouted, as he ran up to him. "Knuckles! Yoo-hoo! Hello!" Sonic shouted up Knuckles's nose, as he waved Knux's hand in front of his eyes.

"Uhhnn... Gwaa... Taagaa…" Knux responded, moaning like a zombie.

"What did you call me!" Sonic yelled, thinking he was being insulted.

"Oh, hi Sonic. I'm trying to figure out why the Master Emerald is green." Knuckles said.

"What! You know very well that you're not allowed to think!" Sonic said, shocked.

"What? Who says I'm not allowed to think?" Knuckles asked.

Sonic took a deep breath. "**TIKAL! HE'S THINKING AGAIN!**" he yelled so loud that dogs went deaf.

Then, an orange ball of light comes out of the Master Emerald. It then turned into Tikal. "KNUCKLES! How many times must I tell you that thinking will make your brain grow!" she said as though Knux had just committed the worst crime imaginable. Then she slapped him so hard that his head got stuck in the ground.

Eventually, Knuckles got his head unstuck. "At last! I've done it!" he announced with pride.

"Done what?" Tikal asked.

"I know why the Master Emerald is green! It's green because-" Knuckles started to say.

But before he could finish, Cosmo had cast Judgment, for no reason. Countless beams of divine destruction fell from the sky. Then, defying the laws of Cruxis, each beam hit the Master Emerald, causing it to shatter into a million pieces.

"AHHHH!" Knuckles screamed, as he jumped of the island after the pieces.

"Hey, does anyone know where Peaches went?" Shadow asked, but everyone ignored him.

Tikal and Cosmo looked at each other and sighed.

"That was close." Tikal said.

"Yes, I'm aware of that." Cosmo said. "If Knuckles had discovered the truth…"

"Yeah," Tikal said, "he'd be as mad as the author is about the fact that Sega isn't putting all of the Sonic games on Nintendo systems, if he found out that the Master Emerald is just a big rock with green spray-paint."

Meanwhile, Knuckles was falling through the sky. "(_sigh_)_ I wonder if I'll EVER be able to collect all those pieces again?_" he thought to himself. Then, suddenly, he had discovered that he had entered a Sonic Advance special stage.

Then, a 3-D, computer representation of Yuji Naka's head appeared. "Collect 1 ring." he commanded, as he floated by Knuckles.

"Only ONE ring?" Knux asked.

"Yes, just ONE gold ring." responded the floating one.

"Piece of cake!" Knux said with cockiness.

"Well then, good luck!" Naka said. He then opened a plot hole, pulled out a cell phone, and dialed a number with his tongue. "Hmm, let's see, 1-800-I-EAT-DOTS." he mumbled to himself.

Meanwhile, somewhere in Pac-World. Pac-Man was trying to get some well deserved sleep...on a bed of nails, and then the phone rang. He stumbled out of bed, "**WHAT!**" he yelled into the phone.

"Hello, is this Pac-Man?" Naka replied through the phone.

"**WHAT THE BLOODY HELL DO YOU WANT!**"replied Pac-Man.

"Is your refrigerator running?" Naka asked.

"I'll go check the God damn thing!" stated Pac-Man. He literally dragged himself into the kitchen. "Uhh… it isn't running per se'. It's walking out the door, wearing a cloth over its face, and it has a machine-gun strapped to its back and its saying "I am going out to slaughter 10,000 innocent American refrigerators, in the name of God." in Arabic." Pac-Man said, obviously hallucinating from a severe lack of sleep... Or was he?

"…... Uhhh... Well then, I think you should call 1-800-SONIC-IS-BLUE-KNUCKLES-IS-RED-TAILS-IS-ORANGE-EGGMAN-IS-UGLY-AND-SEGA-IS-THE-GREATEST-MOST-AWESOMEST-VIDEO-GAME-COMPANY-EVER-CREATED-ONLY-BECAUSE-OF-SONIC-AND-ALL-OTHER-SEGA-GAMES-EXCEPT-NIGHTS-INTO-DREAMS-SUCK." suggested Naka.

Pac-Man then hung up and dialed the ridiculously long, made-up phone number.

Back in the special stage, "What the heck was that all about!" Knuckles asked Naka, who disappeared without saying anything. Knux continued to fall for what seemed like 10 seconds. "AHHHHHHHHHH!" he screamed as a ring the size of 30 Jupiters flew at him. Then, do to unknown forces, Knuckles somehow remembered an event that didn't happen.

-IMAGINARY FLASH-BACK-

Knux and Blaze were sitting somewhere doing nothing.

Then, do to his utter lack of reasoning, "Hey Blaze, are you related to that fat cat Big?" Knux asked idiotically.

"**WHAT...DID...YOU...SAY!**" yelled the cat, striking fear into the heart of Knuckles.

"I…er…uhhh… A-are you a big fat cat?" Knux asked, assuring certain death.

"**_GUARDS!_**" (A/N: magnify that 100 times) Blaze yelled so loudly that Knux went deaf.

Then, a bunch of lawn-gnomes entered the room, "What do you wish of us my queen?" asked a Guardn' Gnome.

"**_PUNISH HIM!_**" (A/N: magnify that 200 times) Blaze commanded. The Guardn' Gnomes inflicted 'canned-beat-up' upon Knuckles.

"OWW-OWW-OWW!" Knux moaned in pain.

"**_OH, YOU WANT MORE, DO YOU!_**" (A/N: magnify that 300 times) Blaze asked menacingly, with a look of menacing menacingness in her eyes.

"**_AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!_**" Knux screamed in agonizing agony, as the enraged queen turned into a fireball, and opened his mouth to the size of 31.7525 Jupiters.

-END IMAGINARY FLASH-BACK-

"_That's it!"_ Knux thought to himself. "Hey Blaze! If you can hear me I just want you to know…YOU'RE A BIG FAT BLIMP!"

Then, a portal from another dimension opened, and a flaming cat flew out of it. "**_KNUCKLES! YOU BUTT-FACE! _**" (A/N: magnify that 500 times) Blaze yelled.

"**_AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!_**" Knux screamed, as Blaze set a new record for opening his mouth, 1000.123 Jupiters, and then disappeared. "_I can't **possibly **miss it now!_" Knux thought to himself. The edges of his mouth were scraping the edges of the tunnel. The ring, now comparatively small, flew right into his mouth and choked him.

"CONGRATULATIONS! You've won two Chaos Emeralds!" yelled Naka's head, popping out of nowhere. The Chaos Emeralds fly into Knuckles' eyes. Upon contact, his eyes inflate like air-bags. "And that's not all. As a special deal we'll throw in 1000 tons of dirty cat litter, courtesy of the author's cats!" Knux screamed for 10 chapters, as the dirty cat litter flew, unavoidably, into his mouth. Then, as Knux exited the special stage, Naka ranted something about himself being 'The True Ultimate Lifeform', and then exploded.

Eventually, Knux found his destiny in a bowl of alphabet soup. And then he splashed into the ocean, and began searching for his shiny green rock. He found it. And then he started looking for the Master Emerald pieces. "Emmy? Where are you Emmy?" he called the emerald's nick-name, as he swam around in the water directlyunder the now emeraldless Angel Island. He looked up the definition of asparagus, and then looked up into the sky.

**SPLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSH! **The no longer floating island crashed down on top of Knuckles, and pushed him to the sea floor.

Meanwhile, in a cornfield somewhere, a deranged cow was making crop circles…

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Me: The next chapter is part 2 of this chapter.

Tails: But, it's a different chapter.

Shadow: DEATH TO ALL WHO OPPOSE ME!

Me & Tails: Uh-oh! RUN!

Shadow: CHAOS BLAST! (_destroys computer_)

Computer: BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE...


	9. Chapter 9

... ... ...SYSTEM REBOOTING... ... ... ... PROGRAM INISTIALISING... ... ... ... WELCOME TO WINDOWS

Okay, I fixed the computer...

Disclaimers: I do not own Sonic or anything else.

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**Chapter 9**

**An Attempted Rescue Mission… Sort of…**

The next day, Knuckles was still trapped under Angel Island.

"Everyone, I need your attention, please." Tikal said, "Now, the plan is-" But before she could finish, she heard snoring. For some reason everyone else was asleep. Tikal used an air-horn.

"AAAAAHHHHH!" the others screamed as they woke up.

"Tikaaaal, what's the big idea?" Sonic asked, still groggy.

"We have to save Knuckles." Tikal said.

Tails looked at his invisible watch. "But, it's only 3:00 PM." he stated.

"I don't care. Now YOU go save Knuckles!" Tikal commanded.

"What! Why do I have to save Knuckles?" Tails asked.

"Because, you're the only organic being in the known universe who can swim!" Tikal replied.

"Can't I just take the Sea-Fox?" Tails asked.

"NO! That's not possible anymore." Sonic butted in.

"Why not!" asked the fox.

"Because-a Nintendo-a launched-a it-a to-a the-a planet-a Zebes-a, and-a then-a Samus-a blew-a it-a up-a." announced Luigi, after he jumped out of a big green pipe.

Tails started crying, as he looked at an ancient cave drawing of his old submarine.

Then Sonic threw Luigi into an oven, cranked it up to 1,000° C, and set the timer for 1,000 years. For a moment, everyone remained silent.

"I'll go." Shadow announced.

"Very well. If you're willing to drown, then go." Tikal agreed reluctantly.

"Then, I'm off to save the Wizard, The wonderful Wizard of Oz!" Shadow sang, "CHAOS CONTROL!" Then he disappeared.

Five seconds later, Shadow reappeared five inches from his previous location. "Knucklehead? Knucklehead? Where the Hell are you, you blasted echidna!" Shadow yelled, unaware of the others in front of him.

"Umm… Shadow, are you okay?" Tikal asked, justifiably concerned about his sanity.

"AHH! Stay away from me, you over-bloated egg!" Shadow yelled. Then he threw a Chaos Pie at Tikal, thinking she was Dr. Eggman.

Then, the real Eggman comes over the horizon, riding a pair of horses. "Tally-ho! Ride 'em cowboy!" he yelled, as he approached the others.

"Tikal, what are you doing on those equidaes?" (A/N: equidaes is the Latin name for horses) Shadow asked Eggman, thinking he was Tikal.

"Shadow, I'm right here." Tikal stated.

Suddenly, a plot hole opened under Shadow's feet. "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" he screamed, as he fell into it.

"Shadow, NOOOO! I won't let you die, my love." Tikal yelled, as she purposely followed him into God knows where.

"Hey, Tails… Tails?" Sonic said, as he looked around for his little buddy. "Hey Cosmo, have you seen Tails?" he asked. (A/N: Get your dictionary.) "My beloved little Tails is presently positioned underneath the surface of the enormous body of seawater that environs this isolated landmass, undertaking an expedition to salvage that dunderheaded echidna." Cosmo replied, downright cryptically.

"**WHAT!"** Sonic yelled, so loudly that something snaps inside Eggman's head.

Dr. Eggman suddenly jumped behind a conveniently placed shower curtain and turns on the water. Sonic decided to investigate the anomaly. He lifted the curtain and saw... a unicorn taking a shower, who slapped Sonic so hard that he flew past Cosmo, and hit a palm tree. Then Sonic got hit on the head with an exploding monkey.

The unicorn closed the curtain. Then, Eggman jumped out from behind the curtain, however, something was…different about him. He was now wearing a goldfish cape, and had a smiley face on his chest. He had transformed into (_drum roll_) E.G.G. Man (A/N: E.G.G. Man stands for **E**xcessively **G**leeful **G**oldfish **Man**). He flew around in circles through the air, and then grabbed his horses and threw them off the island, and then jumped off after them.

"Umm…o...kay…that was weird." stated Sonic, after waking up. "Hey, Cosmo, let me see Tails." he commanded.

"Very well, Sonic." Cosmo said. She reached into a plot hole, and took out a 100 inch, hi-definition, wide-screen TV, with built-in DVD and VHS capabilities, Satellite and Cable and Dolby Pro Logic 10 surround-sound speakers.

"WWWWWWWWWWWOOOOOO000000oooooowwwwwwwwww!" Sonic awed in awe.

Cosmo turned the 'TV' on with her ultra-universal remote. (A/N: an ultra-universal remote can even be used to play the Wii and trigger volcanic eruptions.)

"I love you, you love me, we're a happy family! With a great big hug and a kiss from me to you, won't you say you love me too?" came a blood-curdling incantation.

"AHHHHHHH! NOOOOOOOOOOO! Tails is dead, and it's all my fault!" Sonic screamed in horror, as the purple dinosaur sang.

"Sonic, that is not where my Tailsy-Wailsy is located." Cosmo told Sonic, before noticing that he was trying to hang himself in guilt. "Sonic, wait! Don't do it! He would not desire you to initiate that ritual." Cosmo yelled.

Upon hearing those words, Sonic literally melted out of his noose.

"EWW! YUCK! Aaaany waaaay… The last intelligent being to make use this television, was your estranged female sibling, Sonia." Cosmo announced as Sonic solidified.

"What? Sonia? But how can she stomach that garbage…when she's the same age as me?" Sonic asked a random peanut.

Suddenly, the island began to rise into the sky. "How is this possible? How can this island levitate even as the Master Emerald is currently not present!" Cosmo asked a random noodle.

Then a voice came out of nowhere. "I… have… **THE POWER!**" E.G.G. Man yelled, as he, using his super strength, lifted the island skyward.

Meanwhile, in the ocean. Knuckles shot out of the water, "**AIR!** At last, I can breathe again!" he shouted, "Good thing I kept this Air Necklace doohickey from SA2B. Hey, wait a sec. If I have the Air Necklace, then why was I so desperate to get to the surface?"

Back on the island. "Umm, Sonic, why is Dr. Eggman acting like Super Man?" Cosmo asked.

"I dunno." Sonic replied.

"Fair citizens of Angel Island, I must now take leave of this place." E.G.G. Man said. "Please, do not mourn my departure, for I am needed elsewhere. Now I am off, off to give Metal a foot rub. WOOOOOSH!" Then he dropped the island, and flew away.

"What the heck was that all about!" Sonic asked.

"I am currently unable to respond to your inquiry with an accurate extrapolation." Cosmo replied.

"Cosmo, you should really learn how to speak normally." Sonic suggested.

In the ocean. "Excuse me, Ma'am. Would you happen to know the answer to my question?" Knux asked a seagull. The seagull just stared at him. "Oh, silly me. I forgot to ask you the question. Where in the world is Carmen Sandiego?"

"Oink, oink oink. Oink oink oink! Oink oink." the seagull replied.

Knux hit himself on the head. "Umm... Sorry, I only speak English, French, Spanish, Italian, German, Japanese, Arabic, Egyptian, Hylian, and Mobian." he said.

The seagull flew away.

"Hey, what's this gigantic shadowy thing on the surface of the water?" Knux asked a fish.

The fish swam away in terror.

Knux looked upward. "What the! **AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!**" he yelled.

Then, Angel Island fell back down on top of him.

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Me: Okay, the next chapter isn't fully typed up, so it will be awhile before it's up.

Tails: Why is it that Wal-Mart's water fountains like foxes, but hate everything else?

Me: Because they obey the author.

Majinn Buu: Do you like chocolate?

Me & Tails: (_being turned into chocolate_) AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!


End file.
